My Feminism!

- September 01, 2020

In a nation where the Goddesses are worshiped and the women are severely assaulted or killed or raped or harassed or eve-teased or are effectively acid-attacked, nobody, I believe, not even me, I accept have ever been liberated from provocation,harasment or eve-teasing.

From the very beginning we are educated to hold ourselves, to be careful and aware about individuals around us, to get back home before the sun sets and "dress cautiously". It isn't so much that our folks don't confide enough on us, they do, yet they don't trust the society we live in. Just few days back, I saw a post by my friend when her parents politely asked her to not go for a morning walk because of the newspaper and magazine reads that have been filled out with rape and the acid-attack cases. While a girl’s parent are constantly worried about the safe being of their little girls, are the parents of the young men similarly concerned?

Today, let’s take a look at what the men of a society like ours suffer.

Early this morning, I saw a post on my Instagram feed (Click to view the post), about how a young lady who had serious accusations that 139 men raped her was all a lie and did it under pressure.

Is it so easy to put such a serious blame on someone just for the sake of accusing someone under pressure! Her simple lie has caused so much suffering to all the innocent victims of false accusations. In simple words, we can’t deny that their life has been damaged!

The boys these days are equally unsafe as the girls. While talking to a girl, even they are worried and afraid with all the possible what if situations- What if the girl who has asked me for a lift will report me of harassment if I refuse to her? What if the girl will accuse me of rape just because I didn't do what she had expected me to do? What if my wife will abuse me and my parents for domestic violence just because I refused her idea of living separately? What if.. what if.. what if and what if?!!!

While there are many voicing out for the justice of Nirmala Pant we can't keep away from the fact that there are hundreds of Mr. A out there who are equally the victim of harassment and bogus complaints and false accusations.

Here in this country, if there is a fight between a man and a woman, the society easily blames a man for everything. For instance, When a man slaps a woman, the society says "He's such an uncouth man, how could he beat his wife, it's a case of domestic violence". When a same man is beaten my a woman, the society doesn’t refrain from saying "Take a gander at how she slapped him, he must have definitely done something wrong."

I say it is equally wrong for a woman to slap a man just as it is for a man to slap a woman. People might argue, "It's just a slap!" Well, I believe it doesn't matter if it's just a slap, or two slaps or three slaps. Nobody, I repeat, nobody has any right to raise hand on anybody, nobody has a right to hit anybody.

We talk about equality here, we talk about sexism and gender bias. But do we really mean what we speak?

Well, I do consider myself a feminist. However, I speak loudly for equity and equality and not special power or consideration for women. I believe that if a boy’s school has a ladies washroom, a girl's school should also have a boy’s washroom. I believe that if a man gets promoted because of his ability and dedication to work, a women should never be deprived of the opportunity just because she is married and you think she cannot dedicate to her work. I believe rather than quota for girls, the competition should be fair enough so that nobody will ever dare to say that she wouldn't have been here, if there was no quota system. I believe that no girl should be raped and burned to death for not bringing the dowry and refusing to sleep with a man and no man should be blamed of rape and domestic violence for not having the means to satisfy his girl’s desires and expectations.

I believe we should be equally offended when a man is tormented and bullied, when a man is harassed and when a man is eve-teased and raped like we get offended when the same happens with a woman.

I believe we should stand up for humanity and not simply the intensity of women's rights and the feminism. Only then, I believe we will be creating a good environment for us, for the generation tomorrow and then after.

Peace.